Everything new at I've Got This… Hold My Beer lands in New Arrivals first, before it wanders off to join its own collection. Right now the newcomers have fur, feathers and a frankly alarming amount of confidence. This batch reads like a nature documentary that got its hands on the sports channel.
The golden bear sports league
A bold new series drops a black bear silhouette onto a glowing gold sun, with the brand line curving around the edge, and the bear never once puts his beer down. Bear Tricks pops a wheelie on a dirt bike, Bearon Wheels pedals a bicycle and Slider Bear heads downhill on skis. Goal Grizzzly dribbles a soccer ball, Gizzly Gridiron charges downfield with the football tucked tight, and Slugger Snout winds up at the plate. Paw Putter lines up a careful putt, Hang Ten Claws carves a wave and Puck Paws takes his shot on the ice. Every season covered, not a sip spilled.
Surf's up for the unlikely
The water designs belong to animals with no business on a board. Pug Kahuna rides a wave in a flower-print shirt, pint in paw. Surf, Snooze, Repeat sends a sloth through a curling barrel at full sloth speed, Wombat Waves proves a stocky little wombat can find the sweet spot, and Koala Kahuna cruises the lake with a bottle in hand. Arctic Rider puts a polar bear at the handlebars of a jet ski, and Ocean Ostrich spreads its wings wide over a bright yellow surfboard, balancing like it has done this a hundred times.
Mountains, slopes and one very patient snail
Up in the hills, Rock-Hopping Rabbit scales a sheer cliff with a bottle in hand and Climbing Croaker, a green frog, hauls himself over a stone ledge. Laxy Rider puts a sloth on a dirt bike in the pines, easily the fastest a sloth has ever moved. Koala Carve snowboards through fresh powder, Stallion Shredder sends a chestnut horse flying downhill on a board, mane streaming, and Slow Slide gives a snail a snowy slope, a drink and all the time in the world. Giraffe Drop floats down under a red parachute with long legs dangling over the forest, Prickly Plunge dangles a hedgehog from his own chute straps, drink firmly in hand, and Skateboard Stomper rolls an elephant down the street on a skateboard, mug held high, beside a printed dare: Bet You Can't Beat This.
For whoever you are picturing right now
New Arrivals is for the person who wants the design nobody else has yet. The friend who took up snowboarding at forty, the cousin who tried surfing once and still talks about it, the dad who treats every backyard game like the championship. Scroll the fresh art and one animal will jump out as theirs. Maybe the sloth on the dirt bike. Maybe the elephant daring the whole block. They got here first, and they would like you to hold their beer.
Written by Liam. Thanks for reading.
