Skeletons have a real advantage in the daredevil business. There is nothing left to bruise, no muscles to pull, and nobody at home telling them to act their age, because their age is somewhere around a few hundred. Skeleton Crew is the I've Got This… Hold My Beer roster of bony go-getters who retired from resting and took up everything else, drawn in bold retro poster style with a pun for every occasion and a beer in every bony hand.
The fighters
Knocking 'Em Out, One Bone at a Time puts a skeleton in the ring in bright red gloves, and the Ghostly Jab designs show his sparring partner leaning on the ropes, beer in one glove, very pleased with himself. Bone-Krushing Karate lands a flying kick in front of a city skyline, and En Garde, Bonehead lunges with a fencing foil like he has been waiting centuries for the match. None of them have ever flinched. It is hard to flinch without a face.
The thrill seekers
Bone to Ski races downhill in a red puffy jacket. Catchin' Waves rides the curl under the words Ditchin' the Grave, Grind to Dust launches a skateboard into the air with his mug held high, and Grindin' and Bones on Rails keep the skate park busy. The sky diver leaps with a grin and a pint, the climber clings to a cliff with one hand, Falling Apart in Style tumbles through the pines without spilling a drop, and Tackle to Tombstone charges downfield with a football tucked under his ribs.
The easygoing bunch
Not every skeleton wants adrenaline. Navigation to Nowhere drifts along in a little sailboat with no destination in mind. Swimming in the Buff paddles through the lake with a mug, which he points out is the only way a skeleton can swim. Fishing for Souls lands a big green fish under a ribbon that reads One Catch at a Time, and Par for the Corpse lines up a putt on a patch of perfect green. There is even an archer taking aim for Arrow to Afterlife, bandana tied on, beer balanced in the other hand.
For the one who is too stubborn to slow down
These are for the friend who keeps saying he is getting too old for this and then does it anyway, the grandpa who still skis the black runs, the coworker who loves anything spooky all year long. She would ride a wave in a thunderstorm if the beach were open. He would take up fencing at sixty just to say he did. One look at the bony grin and you will know who fits, because that is SO her. The skeletons have one piece of advice for the living, and it is to keep moving. They tried lying down once and found it very boring.
Written by Liam. Thanks for reading.
